gluey

apothegm this is what i do: love you love me this is how i feel: apology this is where i am: half-way asleep this is who i am: inner most peace this is what i want: the chance to see this is what i need: that chance to be this is what you are: my company this is what you need: for you for me this is what you do: letting love be this is what you need: me to be me you are who i love: unconditionaly

my love will always be                    my love will always be, even rootless and predestined to fail. flailing in the soul's wind with no true, particular hole for a home, and with a dream from nights past still contained in my heart, i'll be too far away to feel. the idiocy of my heart, the puppy-like and known fact that my life is fail safe. that in itself should bring you to tears, in knowing that you'll never lose some- thing so close to you as i indeed am. but i fear we're facing a pragmatic, passe indecision in whereas i'll be love-less. as i've gone too far away to come back, as i've loved to hard for you to know an

So Greatly for that of Tomorrow's New Am waiting for a chance to change my ways. Am generating anti-telepathic waves. My voice will tell me, "everything's not good." "Everything is well enough for time to swell." Am wanting for a change to chance my way. Am never chancing my compromising ray. My ray of disguise under your praise that should, That should be everything, at least to me. Am racing towards a newer "never" again. Am redescribing as once over and ordain. My touch of expanse-past with vesper moods, Unpredictable so as to be unresponsable. Am knowing not but expecting a recur greatly. Am worrying of my antiphony without

to wander the city in the methane daze devouring the husk of the city streets, walking nightly upon the dew-ridden alleys, seeing the rust grow over the corners of society, i find myself wandering in a deep haze, pondering thoughts i shouldn't be... the people i see scuttle about in a hurry, thick trails of smoke follow them closely. they neglect to look at my shadowed body, moving along beside themselves. as i begin to tire from this fast-lived journey, the ground pulls harder and harder until i colapse, and all the while the crowded alleys full of people who neglect to notice me continue to walk by and over my body. uncontent

black pit there is this black pit of self denial inside of me. everytime i breathe in, i can feel it sink deeper and further into my soul. i believe it to be a lie, an escapism used to hide what it is that i am. i need a blast of reality, something real to jar my bones into confession; a strong enough blast to shake my soul free. i need this bad that i could kill someone for it. this black pit that i use for self loathing is taking its toll on me, on my life.

lessness lying awake in bed late, late at night letting the moon light shine down on me, spanning the width of my half opened eyes, engulfing my rich sense of sightlessness, i am thinking and letting my thoughts spread. i am remembering my face and its expression, to further my thoughts, lack of expressions. i cannot decifer why it is that i have not a smile, that i have not a frown, that i have not a tear. i've always been missing a form of what i feel. maybe when i was younger something traumatic happened to me that i fought so hard to forget. that was a mistake thinking back now, i'd rather keep myself to myself and remember.

vitamin gouging out the sorrow of the sunshine sticking holy fingers into my head to pull out the bad ideas and dreams i know there's nothing in there anyway